Usually, 90min’s rankings of Premier League home kits proves to be quite a slog, a battle of which strip is the least horrid more than anything.
But thankfully, kit suppliers have for the most part got their houses in order and produced some stunners for the 2023/24 season.
So, who tops the table this year? Let’s dive in.
For crying out loud, Brentford. Gradient kits have never worked and never will work. This attempt makes even less sense considering the stripes on the shirt don’t match the colour of the shorts.
‘Tinpot’ is a very harsh word and one that is thrown around a lot nowadays. It’s also an accurate one in many cases, however.
Anyway, let’s take a look at Luton Town’s home kit. No particular reason.
The claret-and-blue colour scheme is a hard combination to make work in normal circumstances. Why Castore have endeavoured to make their task even more difficult is beyond me.
A Crystal Palace kit which is half red, half blue and features a pattern of the actual Crystal Palace is a lovely little idea.
So why does it not actually work when put into practice?
Burnley won last season’s Championship wearing a lovely modern take on their old designs.
They have now fully embraced tradition but replaced Classic Football Shirts with a hideous sponsor. Hope the money was worth it, Burnley.
There’s nothing inherently wrong with Bournemouth’s new number, but their funky 2022/23 design was just a tad nicer.
A solid effort from Sheffield United on their Premier League return. Shame the sponsor looks quite flimsy and could peel off at any moment.
Manchester City are reigning treble-winners. Why they want to be reminded of the days when they were absolutely terrible is beyond me. What a terrible emotion nostalgia is.
Oh, Fulham. You were so close to perfection. Back to mid-table for you.
You could tell me this is a Brighton & Hove Albion kit for their Europa League adventure, you could tell me this is a Brighton & Hove Albion kit from their League One adventure. I would believe you either way.
You know what? This Chelsea kit isn’t as bad as was first made out when unveiled.
It still appears a bit bare and more like a training kit without a sponsor, mind.
Nottingham Forest ranked highly last season for a simple design. You can’t get away with that schtick for two years running, I’m afraid.
There isn’t too much different with Wolves’ new kit compared to that of last season, but the subtle tweaks make for a true modern classic.
Well, West Ham, if you’re going to pay homage to a weird song you sing about bubbles, this is a neat way to do so – understated rather than overstated.
If this is to be Everton’s last boo-tastic year at Goodison Park, then at least they’re going out in style. We salute you.
Tottenham have traditionally worn all-white kits when they play in Europe.
This will be their first season without European football in 14 years.
Why did Arsenal decide to commission a kit with gold trim thinking they were going to wear it as Premier League champions?
Definitely nothing to do with their unbeaten 2003/04 season. Don’t Google that. Stop it.
Newcastle have decent kits when they aren’t a violent vehicle for sportswashing, don’t you think?
The flattering shade of red, the subtle rose pattern, the slick black trim.
This could well turn out to be a classic Manchester United kit. But unfortunately for the Red Devils, they don’t take top spot this season.
Liverpool have made approximately, roughly, around about £800bn from sales of this home kit alone.
Why are they being so stubborn in the pursuit of £50m Romeo Lavia, eh?
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